Always on my mind...

I know i should think too much and seriuosly i don't wish to have blogged this... it's somehow inappropriate for this blog's theme...
but something are just always on my mind...
At times i get so frustrated i don't even know what i am frustrating about..!
How should i live my life? How should i treat others? what should i do to make people around me feel happy? which path should i take? where should i be going? what should i be doing? Why am i thinking all of this...?

One of the most frustrating thought:
Most of the time, people say i am neutral... too neutral just like pH 7.000000000
But is it wrong to be the way i am? Again when i try to change, when i try NOT to be neutral, people will say, "Eh.. how come suddenly u become so acidic one?" So just what do you guys what?!!!?
Maybe my neutrality leads to my indecisiveness or the other round, i don't know but again, is it my fault? One classic example: When others ask me where & what you want to eat? As everyone would have guessed, i will definitely say, "You decide lar..." Well, i really feel this way, for me anything will do... others who have a preference can make the decision what.. isn't it better since it's you who have the preference and you will get to eat what u want! But no... the exact same type of people would say, "Why everytime i have to decide one? You don't have any ideas meh? So usually after this statement, of course i will give some suggestions:
me: McD?
friend: don't want...
me: fish & chip?
friend: what? again?
me: then food court lo, convinient what...
friend: don't want lar...
me: how about...
friend: (interrupt) why don't we go eat Japanese food?
me: ... ...
Duh! Why don't you tell earlier and all's well, no need to dilly dally... Of course this is only one of the minor example... perhaps it's really my fault that i can't easily please others?
And i seriously don't like to take sides... so when people are arguing (not real argue, both parties are my friends and most of the time they like to argue just for the sake of argue...), i of course stay neutral lar... what for taking sides? Again kena kutuk by them,
"why you never help me one..." (with the very serious face...)
"okay... next time lor...
Then next time, i decided to take sides, of course when you take sides you can only take 1 side, right? Again, kena kutuk... = (
"Why just now you help him not me? You hor.. everytime stay neutral... when help also don't want to help me... you don't treat me as friend har... fine lor?" (again with very serious face expression) So what am i to do??? Neutral also wrong, acidic also wrong, even alkaline also wrong!
= (

I guess this problem will be always n my mind... How can i truly be happy?